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12/19/2017 12:52 PM 

New Jobs Suck
Current mood:  intimidated

My coworker is unreasonably aggressive with me for no reason. Yesterday was my first day at my second job, and this chick expected me to do everything almost perfectly with no direction. Just because I had experience at a previous location does NOT mean I know how to work that specific position. ...I start my second day today at 4. Until then I am gonna try to take it easy, maybe binge listen to DECEMBERUNDERGROUND since I do that every year in December. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jP7YopofVjk

AFI, emo, a fire inside, Davey havok, jade Puget, adam carson, hunter Burgan, decemberunderground, on the arrow

12/16/2017 05:34 PM 

Self Loathing

The person in the mirror is a stranger to your eyes.Flittering from scene to scene, your clothes are your disguise.Every time you take a swing, it's always been a miss.Don't know what you were meant to be, but know it wasn't this.No one knows quite who you are, and you don't know at all.The dreams you chased have passed you by, your life is at a stall.Strip away your music, job, and strip away your clothing.And all that you have left is more confusion and self loathing.

12/03/2017 11:50 PM 

Sunday, December 3, 2017
Current mood:  grateful

With the first few days out of the way and entering onto the new year, one can only look down at the floor completely dumb-founded at the things that have to have happened this year and where the damned time went.Amazing things happened for me this year. Things that I will never take for granted and things that have given me a new outlook in life.Changes await. I am in my late 20's but I am learning something I feel like I knew all along but I am just now beginning to understand - and that is that I will never stop growing, expanding my life with lessons and journeys and situations will happen every single day until I die.I don't want to go into detail because I COULD sit here, all morning and ramble. I believe in the theory that it takes 21 days to build a habit, and I also believe that it takes another 21 more to keep it... and another 21 to continue it. I feel like new year's resolutions are great because they signify that we accept our human flaws and we intend to work on them. Consciousness in the human persona is a wonderful (sometimes painful) trait to have and practice. This year has been so great and I've been improving (in some areas, others need help). I want to end this year on a good mental and physical stance. I have goals that I would like to achieve throughout the year and I will begin to instill those habits in order to reach my goals now. It's the least I could do to end the year with the gratitude I have for everything that I achieved and received this year.If I don't log on for a few weeks, have a safe holiday season - don't eat too much and you'll be off to a great start in 2018!Be good, be careful, be kind.

holidays, holiday season, new years resolutions, nyr, 2017, 2018, grateful, happy new year

11/22/2017 01:27 PM 

Why I'm alive...

The only reason I'm here today,Is because of my sleep.Because instead of dying only once in realityI get to die a million times in my dreams.

11/11/2017 06:07 PM 

Hey
Current mood:  confused

I'm new here, I don't know what to do...

11/06/2017 04:01 PM 

Welcome 2 Myspace
Current mood:  bouncy

Welcome to Panic! At The Podcast, your refuge for all things scene! Airing TODAY! When the episode is complete, this is where you can watch and listen to our first episode. Follow @panicatthepodcast on IG to stay in the loop!EDIT: Here is the link to Panic! At the Podcast show streamed on Lower Grand RadioLower Grand Radio x Panic! at The PodcastAlso, here is a clip of one of our favorite moments recorded LIVE on instagram.https://https://www.youtube.com/embed/dYhLt3hrLig

10/19/2017 11:58 PM 

burning virgins
Current mood:  ashamed

the unbetrothed lies under the gravel dusta gouge in the earth over heart and fistclench jaw and hand until something combustsa flame in the chest touching wax to lipsnothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy breaks your necknothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy steals your breathdon't believe anything your mother tells youthe nights under broken glass moons to smashif God says anything, ignore him toothe cross can fail you, the heart is rashi pray to see my destinyi pray to take your miseryi'll never want anything morenothing can replace the virgin girlnothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy breaks your necknothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy steals your breathnothing can replace the virgin girl

poetry, poem

10/17/2017 12:10 PM 

Social Media (add/follow me and ill add/follow back!)
Current mood:  awake

☆Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100016895735108☆Instagram - @alex.senpai.yt☆Imvu - AlexxSenpaii☆Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFeTltjAC0mB-XiQaYmGwvQ☆Vampire Freaks - https://vampirefreaks.com/AlexSenpai

10/14/2017 12:45 PM 

im about to EXPLODE
Current mood:  tested

my brother thinks its cool and fun to be a complete a**hole ALL the time, EVERY DAY!!!!!!! he took my car keys and left without asking, then stayed out WAY past curfew, then acted like mom is crazy for yelling at him for it. and thats not counting the 22 darts he shot into my bedroom wall before he left. he tries to bitch about mom to me like we're bffs in middle school or something. that is our MOTHER!!!! maybe she isnt the best person in the world but holy hell he has no right to talk about her the way he does. now hes just laying in bed singing along badly to classic rock like he never did anything wrong. like theres no one trying to f***ing sleep??? its almost midnight! Oh My God!!!!!i am just tired of this sh*t every single day. he acts like hes too cool for our parents love and attention. but once he moves out and loses it, then he'll want to take it back. then he'll know how i feel.everyone in this family is so f***ing selfish. no one ever thinks about anything but themselves or aidan. yeah, i get it, cancer and stuff, but hes perfectly healthy now so can i talk about how im severely traumatized???? nope! can my parents love and support me? No! Ex Dee! xD i want to die 

10/06/2017 06:41 PM 

Running out of films to watch
Current mood:  examimate

Its strange to think that I've come to this stage, I'm actually running out of films to watch on YouTube. I have watched so many films on there over the past few years I have probably forgotten most of them.When I look for new movies to watch I am finding less and less that i have not already seen.I have started re-watching stuff I have already seen before.This may sound like nothing to most people but it depresses me. Watching movies on YouTube is pretty much my favorite thing to do these days, the idea of running out of films leaves a huge void in my life.

10/03/2017 07:20 PM 

Journal # 3

So the dog fights have gotten worse and worse. If Dane even see's Dillinger, he flips out. I never liked Dane. Now I'm being forced to get rid of my dog who is a service dog for my anxiety. How could my parents be so selfish? Why get rid of the dog that helps me and clearly isn't the problem here? My parents are stupid as f***. One of these days that dog is going to attack another animal at the dog park or something and my parents will end up with huge fines and maybe even have to put the nut job down. I will never forgive that animal for this. Me and Dillinger are pretty close and he shows how much he appreciates me by his affection. If my parents are going to be that stupid, then I'm not going to be helping out with the animals when they need me to. As far as I'm concerned, Dillinger is my responsibility not the other 2. I can't wait for the day they ask me for my help and I get to throw it back in their faces. I hate Dane so much I act like hes not there. Remind me to never get his bread. They are overly jealous and protective. That's so not cute. I'm pissed off. Why the f*** should I be the one punished and Dilly being the one punished? Dane is the issue. F*** that dog. I hope he gets hit by a car and dies. That dog officially made me his enemy and I can be really cold. I'm not going to do jack sh*t for that piece of sh*t. Nope! In the end he will get his mark my words. He will attack some other innocent dog or person and end up having to be put down. When that day comes, I'm going to throw a party and celibate the fact that hes dead. Yea, that's some true hate right there. 

09/23/2017 04:57 PM 

My DIY CD COMPLETED.

Did Composing/photoshoot/ design all By my self..To the factory DATA. Brought it to the ESP shop all my word documents and disk. Right now i have dummy cabs.heard at shop brand new v30s MESA does all..revised refined. Oneday I want real mesaV30s. Thanks for reading. I bought Dean R koonz Phantoms DVD for cheap. Drinking ginger ale. Listening to stabbing westward ungod.

09/16/2017 07:40 PM 

Sea of Tears

Cast adrift on a sea of tears,Was too afraid to face my fears.Eaten from within by grief,Our time together much to brief.Now I sally forth by night,Barred forever from the light.The violent serpent strikes my boat,My enemies are poised to gloat.Now run aground on rocky shelf,I find the strength within myself,To face my fate with stoic calm,Not afraid to come to harm.I'll slay the beast from which I'd fled,I'll slay the beast or end up dead.

09/01/2017 01:05 PM 

whoo
Current mood:  crunk

this site is so cool omg im gonna cry aaah

08/28/2017 03:05 PM 

When I press my DIY CD free give away

My disk design and sleeves are done.Im thinking about putting altered voice to my songs.My music project official site is here: https://pulsesignal.web.fc2.com/index.htmlI will do gig around where I live. I got two story boards combining into one.Industrial horror / Post hardcore = xXTACTICAL COREXx



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