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maggie showed me a couple more cool things on shein, and we looked at the moonglow jewelry again :)) we chatted about movies and stuff, and then we played cod:) i left for my study and then when i got back we hung out for like an hour and then they went to service. they made a really good comment, and then jocelyn got jealous and tried to get attention back >:( we played ranked and it was going well, but theres this really annoying gun that blows up when it shoots, so its like a grenade launcher sniper rifle. after we figured out which gun it was we started leveling it up against noobs lol. after we stopped playing we watched this really funny/trippy movie called heathers. i didnt know what to expect so i was like wtf a few times lol. apparently they made a remake and it sucked lol(ofc) we talked about and read about the little/caregiver thing. i hope im a good caregiver for maggie. maggie started getting sleepy and asked me if i was talking about kamala harris lmao. they fell asleep not too long after that. 

Hiii !Melo here :DIm  16yo, born in 2004My zodiac sign is geminiI live in france but im mostly spanishIm nonbinary, my pronouns are : they/them and hi/himIm autistic and also use neopronouns paw/pawsMy favorite color is pinkMy favorite food is chicken nuggetsI love plushies, especially my frogAnd i think thats all :p

so was any1 else at the whole post human:survival horror listening party livestream sh*tcause f*** it was awesomei stuck around for the whole thing 3 times cause i had nothing f***ing better to dodamn it was epicOli took ages to get on the chat though :(all in all it was f***ing amazingmy favourite song from it (dear diary,)-emo_trash04 

sorry abt disappearing for a moment T_T i completely forgot to post :<

maggie showed me a cool drawing theyre working on for a look :o its gonna be amazing. they were shopping on shein and they showed me the cool stuff that they liked. some of its awesome. i got maggie an adorable cardigan:) its so cute i cant wait to see them in it. we talked about maggie feeling little. we played for a while, and we did ok. we both really wanted pbnjs lol. i fell asleep while we were watching 30 rock lmao. maggie says im like an old man. we chatted for a little bit, and talked about elementary school and how they killed their science project ants lol, and about me being a crybaby lmao. we went to bed not too long after that

it's been a while since i've written here, i was considering using this as a diary of sorts since no one actually reads blogs, but if you want an insight into my head, then continue reading.i keep having nostalgia for times i was never born in. i have nostalgia about the 50s, the 60s, the early 00s, and i just wish i grew up back then without all of this bullsh*t. growing up into this world is terrifying and i feel pressured to swing my political and moral values towards the left but i cannot completely side with them on all issues. it's hard making friends because i'm afraid if i out myself as a centrist or say something wrong that they'll reject me. this world is truly terrifying. last night, i was watching stuff about freakshows and graves and sh*t like that and i saw all the people gathering around and having a good time. i've always taken social situations for granted but i miss it so bad. i want to go to the fair with my boyfriend. this decade is just so awful and i have no hope for the future. i'm at the point of giving up. my eating disorders are getting worse and worse and it's really affecting my mood swings and i think i may be borderline. i have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, i'm gonna try getting on birth control and start going to counseling and hopefully be referred to greater lakes for therapy and/or treathment. i don't want to out my eating disorder. i love ana, she's glamorous. 

ilu sm

skool f***en sucked today but at least i have my friends -w-

     So, I applied for Cedar Point Ride Operations yesterday! Their recruiting team set up my interview for Monday at 10am, my time. I am so excited to, hopefully, work there for another season. I don't have children and my husband and I have no problems being apart for 7 months, he of course would visit me for vacation but other than that, we would just phone each other and video chat!     I am really hoping to be working Steel Vengeance this summer. It is Mean Streak reimagined! I worked the Mean Streak crew one season so I would love to come back and work Steel Vengeance! Gosh, I haven't been back to Cedar Point since 2011, my last season. So much has changed! I promise that if I am employed there, I won't take anything for granted! I will be taking pictures and enjoying time with new friends! Just thinking about what could be has got me so full of energy and excitement!     Some things I am sooooooooooooo looking forward to are: Employee ride nights (3 rides are open for unlimited riding for employees and it is a party in the park with free food, games, face painting, and contests to win prizes), working with a crew and getting crew shirts and hoodies, Going into the park on days off and enjoying rides for free, seeing the 4th of July fireworks no matter if I am working or off, employee only bar where many memories have been made - not to mention my public intoxication misdemeanor I earned there (oof, I learned my lesson though), moving into the dorms and decorating my part of the room, having roomates, being free, and just plain old making memories.     Some of the places I want to go to outside of Cedar Point while I am there are: Ghostly Manor (365 day haunted house), Norwalk Raceway, Put-in-Bay, Kings Island (which as an employee of Cedar Fair, I get in for free as well), and anything new I have yet to experience since I have last been there. Last night, I couldn't sleep because I was thinking about how I want to decorate my part of the room. I already know I want to put string lights up and pictures of Ryan (my hubby) and me! And posters of Gerard Way and the band! I have my locker planned out to be super cute.      I love the dorm life! I love having roomies! My hubby and I want to always have roomies living with us. My momma lives with us! When we move into our first house, we hope to have other roomies! But, that's one of the reasons I am so excited for the season! Roomies! I love being around people who share the same interests as me. And trust me, if someone didn't like roller coasters or the atmosphere an amusement park brings, they wouldn't be working there! Cedar Point is where I found out who I was! My dad kicked me out when I was 19 and all I had was Cedar Point and the friends I made there. I was free! I became the person I am today, developed my own world views, and became my true self! There is so much freedom in that!     If you are young and have nothing planned for the summer, or if you have a job you hate and are 18+ (18+ in order to live in dorms, anything younger and you'll have to be local), I promise you, you will not be disappointed! The experience and the memories you make! The freedom you have, while also learning responsibility! The last time I worked for Cedar Point, I made $7.75 as an Assistant Team Leader ($7.25 as a normal ride op) and now they are paying $12-$15 an hour. It is easy money! Fun money! Yes, you will most likely work overtime a lot, but there are always people like me who want to work your hours. So, say you are working 1130am-close and I am working open to 6pm. I will most likely want your hours and ask if you would rather go home at 6pm or stay for your entire shift! I am always chasing that money and with Cedar Point, it is so easy to do! And fun!     If you made it this far, first off... thank you for reading! If you have any questions, I am full of answers!

bran new mixtape the street s may go walnuts for this one...https://mega.nz/file/tgxiUDAL#KzgupkC5ETaTKpQ6PdI5qK2X7Lpn6Rxh5Z3-VJew7Zo01 - Intro (2:19)02 - Buy Visa 2 Dis (2:31)03 - lil durk - dis ain't what u want (NEOCHIRAQ HALF-LIFE STRIP CLUB remix) (2:31)04 - Song4DaHoes(RIP Barry White) (3:29)05 - mr getto - walmart #semtex RMX (2:06)06 - savage #semtex RMX07 - Ride In Car 2 Dis*** lil herb lil bibby know sum remix (4:07)08 - Runna Wasteyute Over W/ Strap No Brampton (1:05)09 - Im A Ridah (0:50)10 - That's all (0:55)11 - Everytime they swing my door (1:56)12 - Stab Wound (6:56)

yoo check this:www.joseju.comcool.

we watched the 2nd half of slc punk today :o it was awesome! maggie showed me some of their favorite clips from inglourious bastards, which is one of their favorite movies. we watched clips from another movie called apocalypto, and a few others too. it was really fun. were gonna watch inglorious bastards when we have time to. we watched this super funny andy samberg movie today. its called hot rod :o there was a commie parade outside maggies building today lol. they were talking into megaphoness and stuff haha. we played cod for a bit but we lost a lot so maggie got kinda bored ina few games,  so we watched some yt. we watched some cool world cup videos. the crowd gets so loud sometimes :o i made myself food :O i cooked pambazos all by myself:) and they were really good but the chorizo was a lil dry ig. i prepped my chicken for tomorrow too. we watched some cool indigenous stuff today, and maggie told me about he oaxacans. we watched clips from stand and deliver. maggie wants to go to a pow wow. maggie made me dance for them lmao. i suck but its still fun, and i like making them laugh. we watched a couple episodes of daria and then went to bed:)

we didnt talk too much in the morning, and then we went to our meetings. that was cool. today was supposed to be civil war day and nothing happened lol. oh well. we played one game of cod and then we started watching yt:) we watched a bunch of d*ck gavett interviews which were pretty cool i think. hes a really good host. we talked about objectification and feminism for a bit too. we looked around at cannibal accusations for an actor guy. it was interesting, and it was funny cus a lot of the stuff he said people were saying was gross but me and maggie were fine lol. he was a cringey weird dude though for sure. maggie says i used to sound like him a little lmao. ig i was super cringe. we tallked about music for a sec too. maggie really made me more cultured. thanks:)) we watched the first half of a super good movie called slc punk. its hilarious. i helped maggie look for food. they really didnt know what they wanted lol. we looked for food for like a long time lmao, and then what they got wasnt even good :/ they did get good cheesecake though:) maggie was kinda grumpy that evening lol. they went to bed pretty soon after though. i thought it was pretty cute

happy bday evan peters 

So I'm trying to juggle everything as usual...taking pics, writing (rather, attempting to write), trying to be ahead of the game for Valentine's, doing normal stuff like cleaning/organizing, trying to manage my emotions, and feeling crappy when I aimlessly browse insta...I used to be better at not doing that. Having to be more discplined about choosing what I put in front of me.Kind of nervous for a set off pics I'm supposed to take tomorrow...with me, anything could go wrong. Even though I've been doing this for forever, if I don't do hair/makeup often (which I don't - only 1-2 times a week), I lose all my skills and have to figure out what looks good all over again and how to replicate things that have worked in the past.But at least, a wig already looks half decent when you put it on (which is what I'm wearing tomorrow) and I think I have good reason to believe I'll get a couple good shots based on how today's pics went...