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yeah, I never finished that challenge thing lol(not that anyone cared about it anyway so it doesn't matter)I had a good day but now I just feel so empty. I feel like everything is so pointless and it's not worth the effort to stay alive anymore.I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of hurting.

theres alot to be grateful for. a roof over my head. food to eat and water to drink. a small circle. im employed. i live in a nice area. but why is it so hard to be happy. i know why, but why complain when others have less. 

theres alot i could bitch abt on here lol im feeling very physically and mentally tired. i dont remember the last time i didnt feel this way. im constantly worrying abt everyones  feelings, and it gets to me that i simply cant do nuthhhhhin but be there. i cant solve peoples problems. energy is a very strong thing.if someones energy is off, it comes directly to me. its like i feel their pain in every way. its a good and bad thing. good becuase i want to know when someone is upset so i can try to help, but bad bc it literally affects me that i cant read whats going on in their mind. i like to be alone for that reason. i get so caught up in others feelings to the point where its like, did i do something? can i genuinly not make someones mood any better? why is this a constant thing? I surround myself with very hurt people. we are all looking for validation, but my efforts are never recipricated. i just dont know. i l want to be there, and make you happy. thats all. this was very messy, i suck at putting my thoughts into words. but theres so much going on up there. 

After forgetting this exists and watching a youtube video that shows Myspace, i remembered this.

the fact that i am not a skinny twinky little femboy who wears fishnets and sundresses pains me more and more every day ♥

Some of you have been asking me what it's like living over here in Eugene Oregon. Eugene is a college town, home to the University of Oregon, my alma mater in fact as well as the home and birthplace of Nike! I've always found this place to be quite beautiful, even cloudy, Eugene is picturesque. It does rain here more than it doesn't but the flip side to that is we have one of the greenest valleys in North America! Eugene lives in the county of Lane and Lane County is known as the number 1 in the world for grass seed. So needless to say my alergies hate me twice a year LOL. Anywho, here's a few images of Eugene, enjoy! Back to News Index

It was a normal morning that day my friend and I who has been staying with my family since quarantine went on a golf cart ride for fun since we live on a golf course. She was driving very fast and made a sharp turn making us tip over in the cart, I ended up breaking both the bones in my shin and had to get two surgeries. I started physical therapy two weeks ago and I've been doing well today was my 4th session I think? But I'm getting better even though I can't walk or put weight on it yet but I did swim and have been doing lots of excersizes to strengthen my muscles back again. I see the doctor on Friday so hopefully I get good news! Now I'm at home I had a snack and will be chilling in bed on my computer! 

Anti Trumper here.Corona is still going on. It's amazing how the response to this pandemic has been. No, its sad. Although I am no Saint (I've been drinking), I still believe wearing a mask is important, as well as proper hand washing. Some people just really do not care. No mask, going to the beaches, crowded super markets, etc. It is what it is. Now we only hope that we don't know someone who dies from it.My grandpa will die from it. He lives in Juarez, MX and contracted the virus a few weeks ago. My father called me last week to let me know they were traveling from Kansas to Mexico to try to wake him up from his coma. I haven't spoken to him since then, but I know. We all know.My grandmother stayed in Kansas at home. She contracted the virus as well. She's sick but not in a coma.Today's word: Numb.

i have the biggest crush on this dude n i also dyed my hair blac

so i think somethings wrong with me. dont be surprised if im committed to a psych ward one of these days

sorry about being so inactive i have major depressive episodes and lose the strength to do literally anything 

any song suggestions?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3fPV58E9tI

  I was just trying to be the good person that i am And i somehow still f***ing failed   Idk why I'm still trying after all these f***ing years 20 f***ing years and I'm still trying to please others     I give up Idc anymore I feel stupid for still trying I feel like an idiot for wanting something that i couldn't even have then   If people don't care Why should i?......

one thing about me is ima figure it out.