11/26/2021 10:23 PM  riverbed (poem) i surrender my teenage dreams to your stagnant waves and muddy tides i'll lie a benthic stone unbeknownst to the living who stare at my watery grave they will not ponder my lost potential my nonexistent lovers my tears uncried my words hauntingly silenced without a thought i am gone. 0 Comments

11/21/2021 08:36 PM  tainted (poem) you're good to me like no one else but i'm afraid i can't live with myself if i become what i've run away from. in my little world there is good and there is bad they struggle to coexist. all this time i've been good but here you are and you're not bad so what does that leave me? will i become the fear i've fought so hard to overcome? or will i turn a blind eye and escape your loving arms before that day can come? this poem is about my fear of becoming the "bad guy" in a relationship. so far in my life, i've been the victim, and i feel like a relationship cannot exist without an abuser and a victim. as much as i want to run away from being abused, if i find a person is genuinely good to me, i panic. if they aren't the abuser, then they must be the victim, and that leaves me the role of abuser, which i never want to become. the truth is, a relationship shouldn't be abuser/victim, it should just be person/person and i cannot seem to get that through my head. if the other person is good, its not because im bad. 0 Comments

10/01/2021 09:30 PM  fresh blood (poem) Current mood:  angsty tw// gun violence, blood i wrote this poem after i had a nightmare about a man getting shot and being close enough to smell his blood. see the hunter run from the wolves limbs flailing, attempting to escape he's surrounded and their guns are drawn he lays still in a red ocean on the grass the firefighters come to wrap him up bad men don't get body bags they drag his oozing body away the air smells like warm pennies. 0 Comments

04/16/2021 08:26 PM  abandonment (poem) run before he can leave before he can go before you're used and tossed aside go before he becomes your self worth your pride. you already know how this story ends you're always alone in a house full of friends no one to save you no one left to hold your hands. quietly cursing God for casting you from Eden when you know the fault is yours to bear hiding ugly lies with cascading tears gets you nowhere. 0 Comments

03/16/2021 10:21 AM  a toy for boys (poem) tw// SA i wrote this in my senior year of high school after i was required to talk about a topic that was triggering for me for a grade i can't talk about this any more. i can't talk about the prying hands between my thighs, the carnivorous eyes that look at me like i am meat; a single heart without a beat. a toy for boys. an anatomical feat. i can't talk about this any more. you can stop when it is time the moment never leaves my mind to hear his plea to feel the guilt i don't want to go below his belt. 0 Comments

01/11/2021 07:17 AM  your celestial body (poem) i could never tire of your back against the earth your soft eyes heavenward and when you come to tire of me i lay against the earth alone i scan the silky night for stars and see your eyes in every one 0 Comments

12/30/2020 10:47 PM  innocence killed (poem) the roots of evil grow like ivy pulling the old stones apart cracking under slow pressure watching morality crumble tearing it down, brick by brick i wish i'd torn the roots out when they were still small someone said they looked pretty i loved them most of all they pulverized me in the end. revenge used to taste so sweet until the child no longer wished to escape but to put an end to it all consumed by vendetta innocence killed.   0 Comments

11/06/2020 06:48 PM  euphoria (poem) tw// implied substance abuse i don't care i know its wrong to like how she feels on my tongue to kiss her until i go numb she dries my tears and lets me rest of everyone she knows me best 0 Comments

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