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I Love Attention and Hate Being Here!!!!!
Current mood:
 angsty
What if i just died! Kidding lol I just wanted your attention. Anyways i just recently moved to college (crazy i know im not actually just a dumbass) anyways on the slight chance that I have a stalker (hey bae) I am not gonna say which but.. spoiler alert its a bunch of alternative white people. Which isnt bad! If i was a sophomore in high school and came here i would probably have a panic attack cuz everyone is cool asf here! but its such a weird culture shock. I am so incredibly confused of who I am and how i want to be percieved. bitches here is cool as fuk! A lot of them look mildly anorexic which is terrifying cuz im a big bitch and I cant easily slide into the small ass desks. but thats just a melodramatic reason to be angsty about being here. primarily I just feel so out of place. God imagine if my hair was still brown too??!? that and my body are the two things that set me apart here but idk i just wanna look like one of those artsy bitches with their little tote bag and nicotine pen and eyebags. whatever. Ive learned to love my skin more though tbh. the reason i feel out of place is also my reasoning for being cool here. it may be borderline fetiziation of my ethnicity just to appease the white people looking for a spicy person to fixate on but you arent my therapist so i do not need to elaborate. either way, even if i feel like the coolest most individual bitch on campus, I feel out of place, I feel like a dumb blonde who cant attribute anything of substance to a conversation. but wtf man! i cant let these people colonize my mind! i am just as important, valid and smart as the bitches here! whatever. im cool and awesome and pretty and perfect and cool. yeah. idk why i started writing this.. im in my critical thinking and rhetoric class and the only thing im thinking critically of is my outfit today. it was pretty cunt tbh. signing out- stay ugly so i can be the prettiest
just kidding i guess
-mars 
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