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Jed Undead

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October 9th, 2023

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Gender: Male
Age: 17
Sign: Gemini
Country: United States

Signup Date:
August 02, 2021

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09/13/2021 12:04 AM 

What a weird f*ckin day.
Category: Real Life
Current mood:  miserable

Ight. Where the heck do I start? The beginning. (TL;DR at the end)

Went to my brother's first soccer game of the season, ended in a tie, 1-1. I don't care much for soccer but I was there to support.

When we got home the neighborhood kids were hanging out on our lawn with their skateboards, my little sister was with them, ages ranging 8-11. Said hi, went to head inside but then the oldest kid did an ollie so I asked if she could teach me because I kinda suck at skateboarding. The youngest kid was giggling and told me that the oldest kid had a crush on me. Older kid looked so embarrassed man. I said "okay cool, I'm too tired to process that" and we continued playing/hanging out and eventually all the kids left. I hope I didn't hurt this girl's feelings. An 11 year old has a crush on me. What

THEN my friends and I had this zoom call, but I FORGOT to change my zoom name and it had my pronouns in it and they definitely saw it and holy sh*t I just outed myself
Changed it as soon as I could but they absolutely saw it, I don't know what to do, these are the homophobic/transphobic friends I was talking about. I know 2 of them are more supportive/probably not transphobic, but the other two...hmmmm I'm in danger.
They all just kinda ignored it, but if anyone asks I'll probably go "I thought you guys knew already" (not a lie, but will confirm my out-ness) and treat it as not a big deal, or I'll go "I was just messing around" (really unconvincing lie, but will allow me to slink back into the closet).
Honestly, f*ck the closet, I was getting tired of it, I'm pretty sure most people had an inkling of an idea anyway, with the way I dress and all. Who f*cking cares. I go to school now. I can make friends there. I don't need these people. I don't care if they f*ckin hate me and abandon me or whatever. It's not like we've known each other since preschool or anything. Not like I care about them...

God. I'm both freaking out and weirdly calm about this at the same time. Feels like my world is crashing down. Terrified but finding it strangely beautiful. I mean... I knew it was gonna happen sooner or later. I was hoping for later. Oh well. I'll be fine, always am.

TL;DR: An 11 year old has a crush on me and I accidentally outed myself to my probably-hateful friends. What a weird f*cking day.
-Jed

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Chad

 

Sep 16th 2021 - 1:45 PM

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years ago i thought about "coming out" about myself too, then i realized it's actually none of people's beeswax anyways, you don't have to tell anyone you don't want to, you're thinking about it the right way, hope everything with that is going well if there's an update


Jed Undead

 

Sep 13th 2021 - 12:22 AM

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Listen, the world's crashed down before. Two years ago being outed was my worst fear, now it just makes me pretty anxious. Years from now I'll barely remember this. All about the perspective. Like yeah it sucks to lose people if they choose to leave me but I'll be okay, y'know? It'll work out.

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