vent

seeing all these people struggling with staying clean makes me feel terrible like im not sick enough i can stay clean (from cutting) for ages and it makes me think im not good enough my life isnt hard enough i should cut more maybe people would take me seriously if i have scars all over me or maybe ill just get sent to the mental hospital but that doesnt sound too bad honestly maybe if i was dead my mum would finally feel bad for all the sh*t she did to me i want to throw up idk i neep help