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(is it too late to post a new years blog on the 2nd?) Category: Real Life
Current mood:
chill
hey heyy :P happy new year guys! 2020 was the actual worst year ive ever lived through, and id like to think 2021 will be better by default, but I dont wanna be too hopeful :/ I've definitely given up on trying to have a real new year's resolution (my first time seriously setting goals was last year, and we all kno how that went >_>), but if I had to make one ig just... surviving? The constant threat of dying because of things out of your control rlly takes its toll after a while so... idk. I just really hope I can make it through this year. I don't really go anywhere but... still. I dunno, when the pandemic started I didn't think it'd rlly get to me or anything (and to be fair back in march we were just expecting to be in a lockdown for a couple of weeks), and I was def wrong abt that. its really weird, tbh. im not gonna lie i didnt have to change a whole lot abt my lifestyle in any serious way (outside of not being able to go to taco bell or the library at first), but it really has a way of creeping in anyway. The constant updates on the myserious new symptoms people can have, the spikes of cases anywhere and everywhere, and the governments blatant disregard for people suffering because they wanna avoid dying. It's... a lot to have running in the back of your head everyday—consciously or not—on top of all the other things you'd normally have to deal with. I pretty much failed last semester and I have to make up a ton of work now... and I actually failed the semester before that after we had to move online. Maybe that says more about me than anything. I'd like to think it's not my inability to handle things and more just... how overwhelming things are right now. If anyone else's been having problems staying productive I'd love to know because I don't think my family rlly gets it, and its rlly discouraging. sorry for getting so personal, but whatever. That kind of thing makes for the best blog posts anyway xD On a better note, I'm still watching buffy with my friend? We just started season 3 and he hates that I still dont like angel xDD but thx for reading, I hope everyone has at least a somewhat decent year? But maybe hoping for even that is pushing it xD
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