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Piffy

Last Login:
January 22nd, 2024

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Gender: Other
Status: Single
Age: 21
Sign: Sagittarius
Country: Sweden

Signup Date:
June 22, 2020

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12/21/2020 09:28 PM 

I need to stop using my blog as a diary. But I dont want to....

(i dont feel like proofreading its 4am and im dyslexic)
I watched this video of the minecraft youtuber Dream talking about what he belives is his biggest weakness and it reminded me a lot of my own experiences with rejection senitive dysphoria (rsd) as a symptom of my ADHD.
I struggled a lot with school growing up due to a lack of support and understanding of my disorders. Anyone with any diagnosis knows the feeling of being offered "time and a half" to compensate for your disability while not feeling lisened to by your teachers when you try to express what you really need. I developed a severe fear of failure around junior high that eventually led me to stop trying in general because in my big child brain failing while trying felt so much worse than just not trying at all.
This fear of faiure is something I still stuggle with to this day, the difference being that it now maifests as my inability to ask for help due to the fact that I hold myself to a very high standard.
God, I shouldnt spend too much time thinking about this stuff. Reflecting on my experiences growing up with adhd makes me sad because it reminds me of how so much of the traumatic sh*t I had to go through growing up was completly avoidable.
If someone had taken the time to see how much i stuggled and actually was able to provide me with the resources i needed things wouldnt be as bad as they are today.
At least this is a good motivator for me to get ahold of my doctor to see if I should start going on adhd meds again...

This got a bit too personal but I enjoy reading other people talk about their experiences with this stuff so ho knows.. maybe this is #realatable
Good Night!!! ♥

Good Night | wowgif

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