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12/19/2017 12:52 PM 

New Jobs Suck
Current mood:  intimidated

My coworker is unreasonably aggressive with me for no reason. Yesterday was my first day at my second job, and this chick expected me to do everything almost perfectly with no direction. Just because I had experience at a previous location does NOT mean I know how to work that specific position. ...I start my second day today at 4. Until then I am gonna try to take it easy, maybe binge listen to DECEMBERUNDERGROUND since I do that every year in December.

AFI, emo, a fire inside, Davey havok, jade Puget, adam carson, hunter Burgan, decemberunderground, on the arrow


12/16/2017 05:34 PM 

Self Loathing

The person in the mirror is a stranger to your eyes.Flittering from scene to scene, your clothes are your disguise.Every time you take a swing, it's always been a miss.Don't know what you were meant to be, but know it wasn't this.No one knows quite who you are, and you don't know at all.The dreams you chased have passed you by, your life is at a stall.Strip away your music, job, and strip away your clothing.And all that you have left is more confusion and self loathing.


12/15/2017 12:01 PM 

Sunglasses at Night - A Short Science Fiction Story

Hello? Can anyone hear me? I've been trying to call back home for God knows how long, I don't even know what year it is anymore. For anyone that can hear me, I need you to listen. I need you to listen and record what I am saying. You may not believe me and what you're about to hear, but what you are listening to right now needs to be heard and told to the right people if it isn't heard by them.             My name is Corey, Corey Sweet. The last time I was here on this earth was the summer of 1988. I was in a band with three other people: Lexi, the singer and the girl of my dreams that I could never seem to get, Doug, our bassist and my best friend since grade school, and Joe, the drummer and our technical guy. I'll fully say that we were the best - Lexi could hit those high notes and I could shred the guitar better than Eddie Van Halen, but I digress. We had just finished a show in some small town in the Midwest; biggest show we had yet, about twenty people showed up. Didn't know if they liked our music or not, but hey, at least they paid the money for tickets to see us. After the show, we decided we should travel north to see if we could get a gig in another town sort of close to the one we played in, and so we packed up and went on the road to our possible next show. But if only I knew what would happen.             The drive was actually much longer than we thought; we must have gotten duped with the map we purchased. We drove for about an hour with not much happening, just Doug talking about how many girls he hopes to see at the show and Joe's mixtape playing in the cassette deck, with Sunglasses at Night coming out of the cheap speakers the car came equipped with. Joe always said he liked playing that song around me because he couldn't recall a time when I haven't been wearing my aviators. Eventually, we reached some dead-end gas station on the side of the road. Doug went out to fill up the gas tank, while Joe ran in to the store to get an ICEE or something. That left me in the car alone with Lexi, free to talk about whatever we wanted. Naturally, I tried to flirt with her, and why wouldn't I - she was the prettiest girl I knew, even if she had quite the temperamental personality.             "So, after our next show, what do 'ya wanna do? I'd like to make a pretty lady like you happy, after all...", I ended up saying. I always tried to compliment her at every opportunity, even if she didn't really appreciate it. "Something, but if we do, I hope you don't try and hit on me the entire time," she replied. "For the record, I'm an independent woman, and I'm not one to easily fall for bad boys like you." I just brushed off that whole thing, bluntly saying "Alright, whatever, Shoulder-Pads." She always got really offended by that nickname, and it was the funniest thing seeing her get all pouty when I said it. She turned away for a few seconds all angry while I smoked a cigarette. She turned back to me and said, "Well, aren't you something of an independent man yourself? I mean, you're seventeen and you're far away from home playing with us, wouldn't that count as independent?" I thought, shoot, why does she have to always come up with smart-aleck replies like that? I threw the cigarette out the window and just shot back a simple "Yeah, I guess so." I couldn't really refute what she said.             She gave a satisfied smirk, put her feet up on the wheel, leaned back and chuckled. "Yeah, I had a feeling you'd be willing to say that," she remarked. I just sighed and looked outside the window. Doug finished with the gas, and hopped back inside, saying "Hey, guys, what'cha talkin' about?" Lexi looked back at him, saying "Aw, nothin', he was just flirtin' with me again." I looked over at Lexi and said "Yeah, and making fun of me for being on my own." Doug just laughed while she shouted at me for a bit. Lexi turned back to him and said "Hey, weren't you the one that convinced him to drop out in the first place?" Doug thought about it for a second, then just replied "Oh, yeah, I was... I forget exactly why he wanted to though, aside from being in the band. Didn't you have one of those 'flower-power' moms, Corey?" I just shrugged and said "Well, yeah, I guess you could describe her like that..." Lexi looked at me, puzzled, and asked if that was really the only reason I ran away with the band.             I had to think about it for a bit - why was I so insistent on being away from Mom? I mean, yeah, she was a total hippie, but for a while I knew that she had loved me with all her heart, if deep down. As I grew older, though, I noticed she started to get way stricter with her rules. Maybe it was suppressed anger with Reagan being president, I'm not really sure, but she grew more and more at odds with what I valued in life. On the same day that I left with the band, we had a huge argument over me being around them, saying that all that metal music was rotting my brain and that I had become too free-spirited or something. On that day, she seemed to have lost all feelings of raising her child, and were replaced with feelings of raising her perfect child. At that moment, she looked like she had completely lost her mind. So what did I do? I just turned around, walked out the door, convinced Lexi to let me go on tour with them... and that was it. I never spoke to Mom after that.             "Yeah, that's the only reason, she was just stupidly strict. I'm totally fine being away from that crazy ol' woman," was all I replied. I wish I hadn't, considering what I just described. We eventually saw Joe come back, with four ICEEs all cobbled together in his hands. I opened the car door as he was walking, ready to take one. He ended up tripping over something, I still don't even know what, and ended up spilling all four of them over my Def Leppard T-shirt. To this day, I still wear that same T-shirt, ICEE stains and all, because over the course of the next few hours... it happened.             After a few more hours of driving, day eventually turned to night. Like the one before it, it initially started off with not much happening. But eventually, we noticed that the road seemed to be much, much longer than we had anticipated. We must have gotten lost, because there weren't even any signs or anything where we were driving. After asking Lexi if she even knew what she was doing, I looked out the window. I saw what looked like a star brighter than any others. After looking for a bit, I noticed it was getting larger, and as it did all of us noticed a low rumbling noise that continually got louder, to the point where it started to get deafening. Before I could even say anything, I noticed it was not getting bigger, but actually moving at blazing fast speeds towards us.             Right before I was about to yell to Lexi, we saw this bright light flash right past us with an ear-destroying noise akin to an explosion. Our entire car almost tipped over from shaking so much. The phone lines near us broke, with one toppling over and landing right behind the car. Lexi screamed in fear, Doug froze up, and Joe started quietly crying. His mixtape had gotten messed up in the process, slowing down and constantly repeating the phrase "west end girls". We saw that thing slowly descend right in front of our car, crawling to a gentle hover above the ground. It looked almost like a gigantic egg, although it looked like it had circular windows on top of it. A door on the front, which I didn't even see at first, slowly ascended.             To this day, I still can't describe the creatures that inhabit the inside. They almost look like they have the heads of dogs or rabbits with human-like bodies. They even have bright white fur covering them, much like a dog or rabbit would. Their eyes, however, are something else entirely - they're empty black voids that almost look flat on their heads. They extend upwards like vertical lines, and they always blink slowly and asymmetrically. They can speak, as I've discovered, but how I've still to figure out, as they have no visible mouths. And one of these things was right there, in front of us, staring quizzically at our car.             At that time, I was just as scared as everyone else, but I had the feeling I could take these things on. How, or why, I don't know, but I wasn't going to let these aliens attack my friends. I grabbed my guitar - my black Gibson SG with a yellow cross design on the front - stepped outside, and held it by the fret board like a bat, ready to beat the hell out of these freaks. I inched ever closer, waiting to strike, while the alien looked down at me ever so slowly. We made eye contact for just a moment, with it looking like it was staring right into my soul. While it was really only for a second, it felt like an eternity looking at each other, with this animal of God's creation sending back a completely unreadable emotion.             Suddenly, I saw it push against a button on the inside of the ship with lightning reaction time, and heard a loud metallic clang from inside of it. A hatch opened up on the top of it, and out of it came this large metal claw, constantly opening and closing. It snapped towards me, grabbing me by the waist, with its grip not loosening as I tried to wrestle free. Suddenly, it pulled me towards the ship, with me getting nauseous from how fast it was moving. I was flung upside-down as it straightened out, ready to pull me inside. It shot downwards, pulling me into a vast black void of a room, with my head hitting against the side of the ship violently as it did so. It dropped me to the floor of the room, and the door on the top shut. This was the last time I ever saw Earth.             What happened in my time on the ship, I can't even begin to describe. Any possible words to describe what I've seen, what I've done, and what they've done, are completely lost on me. Even if I can't describe anything that happened, I can say that what did happen has forever fractured my understanding of reality. I don't know what is going on anymore. The only tangible thing I can describe is this - after many otherworldly experiences, I eventually found a chance to explore around the ship. After waiting for the creature to leave their control room, I have tried almost every single button in the room, hoping at least one of them can contact back home. This is my tenth attempt, and I pray to God this is the right one.             If anyone can hear this right now, please, someone relay the message to everyone I mentioned. If any of them do hear this; Lexi, I'm sorry for trying to flirt with you all the time. Doug, I'm sorry about forcing you to be the bassist. Joe, I'm sorry for yelling at you after every single time you did something minutely wrong. And Mom... oh, God, Mom... I'm so, so, sorry about the fight. I'm sorry about all the terrible things I said to you. I'm sorry for never calling you. I'm sorry for not being there for you. I'm sorry for everything. If you ever hear this, please... I want you to forgive me for all that I did.             I love you, Mom.

science fiction, sci-fi, 80's, short story, story

Sansa Stark

12/03/2017 11:50 PM 

Sunday, December 3, 2017
Current mood:  grateful

With the first few days out of the way and entering onto the new year, one can only look down at the floor completely dumb-founded at the things that have to have happened this year and where the damned time went.Amazing things happened for me this year. Things that I will never take for granted and things that have given me a new outlook in life.Changes await. I am in my late 20's but I am learning something I feel like I knew all along but I am just now beginning to understand - and that is that I will never stop growing, expanding my life with lessons and journeys and situations will happen every single day until I die.I don't want to go into detail because I COULD sit here, all morning and ramble. I believe in the theory that it takes 21 days to build a habit, and I also believe that it takes another 21 more to keep it... and another 21 to continue it. I feel like new year's resolutions are great because they signify that we accept our human flaws and we intend to work on them. Consciousness in the human persona is a wonderful (sometimes painful) trait to have and practice. This year has been so great and I've been improving (in some areas, others need help). I want to end this year on a good mental and physical stance. I have goals that I would like to achieve throughout the year and I will begin to instill those habits in order to reach my goals now. It's the least I could do to end the year with the gratitude I have for everything that I achieved and received this year.If I don't log on for a few weeks, have a safe holiday season - don't eat too much and you'll be off to a great start in 2018!Be good, be careful, be kind.

holidays, holiday season, new years resolutions, nyr, 2017, 2018, grateful, happy new year


11/22/2017 01:27 PM 

Why I'm alive...

The only reason I'm here today,Is because of my sleep.Because instead of dying only once in realityI get to die a million times in my dreams.


11/22/2017 11:57 PM 

On the Positive Side

Some good things though: I made this profile last night, and I died my hair today :3 xD


11/22/2017 11:53 PM 

Current mood:  stressed

I don't know how I should feel, there's so much going on in my thoughts, and they aren't on my side.


11/11/2017 06:07 PM 

Current mood:  confused

I'm new here, I don't know what to do...

Panic! At The Broadcast

11/06/2017 04:01 PM 

Welcome 2 Myspace
Current mood:  bouncy

Welcome to Panic! At The Podcast, your refuge for all things scene! Airing TODAY! When the episode is complete, this is where you can watch and listen to our first episode. Follow @panicatthepodcast on IG to stay in the loop!EDIT: Here is the link to Panic! At the Podcast show streamed on Lower Grand RadioLower Grand Radio x Panic! at The PodcastAlso, here is a clip of one of our favorite moments recorded LIVE on instagram.https://


10/30/2017 02:33 PM 



clover ♥

10/19/2017 11:58 PM 

burning virgins
Current mood:  ashamed

the unbetrothed lies under the gravel dusta gouge in the earth over heart and fistclench jaw and hand until something combustsa flame in the chest touching wax to lipsnothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy breaks your necknothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy steals your breathdon't believe anything your mother tells youthe nights under broken glass moons to smashif God says anything, ignore him toothe cross can fail you, the heart is rashi pray to see my destinyi pray to take your miseryi'll never want anything morenothing can replace the virgin girlnothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy breaks your necknothing to replace what has been burnedyour jealousy steals your breathnothing can replace the virgin girl

poetry, poem


10/18/2017 08:11 PM 

A lil bit about me

Hey there! :)I'm Abigail and I'm really happy to have found this tiny corner of the interwebs. If I had known about it earlier I would have made an account sooner...anyway, just thought it made some sense to express myself a bit so my profile isn't so empty. I'm a musician both professionally and as a hobby. I teach music theory, have taught piano lessons since I was 13, and love to compose/write and sing. Singing is both an old and a new thing for me--I loved singing as a child but the older I got, the more nervous and embarrassed I would get. Finally, I got fed up and started singing again and I AM SO HAPPY. It feels so right and gives me another thing to be creative and expressive with. I also like writing poetry/lyrics and listening to all kinds of music (but mostly metal, post-hardcore, pop punk stuff).I'm a really social person figuring out life stuff which means that being social can become really complicated (read: too stressed about everything haha) but I'm glad to at least be on here to make some friends. ^_^


10/17/2017 12:10 PM 

Social Media (add/follow me and ill add/follow back!)
Current mood:  awake

☆Facebook -☆Instagram -☆Imvu - AlexxSenpaii☆Youtube -☆Vampire Freaks -

clover ♥

10/14/2017 12:45 PM 

im about to EXPLODE
Current mood:  tested

my brother thinks its cool and fun to be a complete a**hole ALL the time, EVERY DAY!!!!!!! he took my car keys and left without asking, then stayed out WAY past curfew, then acted like mom is crazy for yelling at him for it. and thats not counting the 22 darts he shot into my bedroom wall before he left. he tries to bitch about mom to me like we're bffs in middle school or something. that is our MOTHER!!!! maybe she isnt the best person in the world but holy hell he has no right to talk about her the way he does. now hes just laying in bed singing along badly to classic rock like he never did anything wrong. like theres no one trying to f***ing sleep??? its almost midnight! Oh My God!!!!!i am just tired of this sh*t every single day. he acts like hes too cool for our parents love and attention. but once he moves out and loses it, then he'll want to take it back. then he'll know how i feel.everyone in this family is so f***ing selfish. no one ever thinks about anything but themselves or aidan. yeah, i get it, cancer and stuff, but hes perfectly healthy now so can i talk about how im severely traumatized???? nope! can my parents love and support me? No! Ex Dee! xD i want to die 


10/06/2017 06:41 PM 

Running out of films to watch
Current mood:  examimate

Its strange to think that I've come to this stage, I'm actually running out of films to watch on YouTube. I have watched so many films on there over the past few years I have probably forgotten most of them.When I look for new movies to watch I am finding less and less that i have not already seen.I have started re-watching stuff I have already seen before.This may sound like nothing to most people but it depresses me. Watching movies on YouTube is pretty much my favorite thing to do these days, the idea of running out of films leaves a huge void in my life.

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