FriendProject.net

I go through phases of disinterest in this website, in alternativeness in general. It normally coincides with my depressive phases.This stuff makes me happy, but it also makes me different and gives people reason to mistreat me.Sometimes I'll see something and it makes every bone in my body ache to go back to a simpler time.I didn't care back then. Yeah, people bullied me but I didn't care. I was confident enough in myself to just flip them off and go on with my day. I had friends, music that I loved without abandon, I was happy.Now all I do is overthink. I criticise everything I wear, do, say, create until I hate it all. I am embarrassed of myself. I am ashamed to be myself.I wish I could exist in a space where there was only me, me and the things I love. I used to have that - I could escape to a fantasy world and do whatever the f*** I wanted with no consequences.But now even my dreams are haunted by the people in my life who ridicule everything I am. I have no escape anymore.I want to be free, I want to go back to that happy place, but I can't.

Its been forever since I’ve logged on here lolI’ve been playing some of my favorite games that I used too, like wizard101 and roblox. I loved those games, and it turns out I still do. It’s hard to find old games on roblox now but it’s still fun to find the ones I used to play. I never got to have a membership for wizard101 so my play time as a child was just replaying wizard city. But know I have some money of my own and it’s alot of fun. A bit grindy but that’s expected tbh. Idk what else to talk about, if anyone wants to play wizard101 just message me!

Gefendr heilirgestr er inn kominnhvar skal sitja sjá?Mjök er bráðrsá er bröndum skalsíns um freista framaGivers, hail!A guest is come in:where shall he sit?In much hast is he,who on the way hasto try his luck.

ruh oh im gonna talk about my health again everybody clear the funk out.ok so. i did my sleep study like, last week. the results just came tf in and i do indeed have sleep apnea (or slapnea, as i call it bc who doesnt make jokes about their conditions??) so like....cpap city here i come!! im not 2 thrilled about it lol. its gonna be weird. but!!! aside from tht ive been on a fun diet for like 2 months almost and i lost like 20 pounds so far or something so thats wild. i dont feel Physically different but i dont get the urge to snack all the time no more. its magic! !! I F***ing Love Protein. and theres like low carb versions of eeeverything. its tight as hell.oh and i have to go to the dentist this week which i am pretty excited for bc i forced myself to take better care of myself by simply hyperfixating on dental hygiene. like it worked but normally ppl dont get excited abt having tools in their mouth and drooling everywhere. oh well we been knew that im weird.im str8 up Abnormal. thats cool with me

Last night I had a dream that I was watching a Green Day concert. There was a large bell on the stage and Billie Joe jokingly was like “haha ok who knows how to play a bell?” (Since he often brings fans onstage to play guitar) and the crowd, small, since it was a small venue, started yelling and such.  Billie walked around towards the crowd trying to find the person to play the bell. He got to me and I jokingly remarked, “I’d be good at it. I played percussion in middle school so I know how to hit a bell once and not do anything else for the rest of the concert.” And Billie, amused by this, said, “That’s hilarious get your ass up here.”  And thus I did get my ass up there and made my way to the bell. It was attached to the ground, and was operated by a petal, much like a drum. After a few moments of being hyped up by the band and crowd I went to step on the peddle...  I ran up, raised my foot... and! Missed the goddamn petal! I had thoroughly embarrassed myself in front of at least 100 people AND Billie Joe Armstrong. I wanted to try again but it was too late. My legacy had been cemented into history as the person that f***ed up ringing a bell onstage at a Green Day concert.  My dream continued, but it wasn’t as interesting as this specific part. I will take this vision as an omen and a warning to not get so cocky in my ability to do things that I see as simple. ~🕸Cobweb Gossamer🕸~

I LOVE BIRDSi am bird manbordddbird boychirp chirp ♥ i feel some kinda sh*tty so its bird time!

Gáttir allaráðr gangi framum skoðask skylium skygnask skyliþví at óvíster at vitahvar óvinirsitja á fleti fyrirAll door-ways,before going forward,should be looked to;for difficult it is to knowwhere foes may sitwithin a dwelling.

i want to grab you by the rosary beadspull you close to my face and let the proximity of our lips tempt you into committing the most egregious sinlet me corrupt you in ways that you couldn't imaginebecause i think i could turn your mind to mefor i am but a simple devotee kneeling at the shrine of your feetmy god, my god, why have you abandoned me?my screaming prayers fall on deaf earsi'll keep one hand on my bible tonight and the other on my switchbladewe could be perfect one last nightand live like star-crossed loverswe could live like star-crossed lovers. (butyouwon't)a b b y

I’m sooooo bored 😭

so i’ve been thinkingi mean i don’t have a real band band yet, but so far i’m friends with two other guys who wanna start something, and they’re both pretty good at their stuff (drums and guitar) and i’m alright at screamingwe’re having ‘band practice’ on monday, and possibly saturday if we can, and i’m excited cause we’re probably gonna be doing mcr covers to start and i LOVE screaming mcr songs so much, it’s so fun! anyway, they say they’re horrible with lyrics but since i make poems i might be alright at it.. tbh if i can scream it i’ll sing itanywayi live in toronto and the music scene here is really really cool and big (i’m seeing a local show tn!) but there aren’t many bands that have a harder tone, most are mellow. what i’m trying to say is, if my band is more screamy and energetic, surely it would get attention... ? i don’t know, i think i’m just daydreaming a bit too much. in terms of crush stuff.. i have two right now but neither seems like they’d be interested in me, bummer. i keep having really nice moments with one of them (yesterday we went into a room and they played guitar really nicely and i just watched,, ) but i feel like they have some weird resentment for me. i don’t know.. i wish i didn’t feel this way for either of them, having unrequited love is very saddening and if not that, then just strange okay i’ll stop rambling nowcan you believe my chem tix sold out in 12 minutes?!? crazyryan

THEYRE BAAACK!! MCR IS BACK!!! HOLY F***!! YeeeeaaaaAAAAAAH

hello it’s been a while!!!!! i’m writing this at 230 am since it’s nit halloween anymore but i’m just gonna talk abt stuffso first off today ROCKED, it exhausted but i was a vampire and everyone loved my costume.. i wore fangs the whole day and they looked awesome . didn’t trick or treat but i watched scary movie 2 with some good friends and it was really fun!! then i hung out with another group of friends and now i’m finally home. for a bit i thought i couldn’t take off my fangs cuz they wouldn’t pull off, but tbh i was pretty prepared to just live with them my whole lifealso, MY CHEM IS BACK! !!!!! can you believe it????? i heard the news and ran into my friends class just to scream about it.. it honestly feels so surreal. i really really hope they do a world tour and come here, i can’t believe i’d be able to say i saw mcr in 2019 when i was 16/17.. god! what a timeline we live init also means gerard and the guys are in a good spot mentally and emotionally and physically because they’d wanna do music stuff again for good! i’m very proud of them!! i love them and they’ve all grown and changed so much as musicians and people :-)what else.. hm. it’s very windy right now, i’m very tired .. the next few days r full of plans! tomorrow i’m going to see my friend (*cough* crush*cough*)’s band play.. no i’m not going just for my crush, i’m excited! and on saturday there’s a bigger show and i’m seeing local bands play! sunday i’m watching scary movies and hanging with some friends that live a bit further away, so i might sleep over.. and on monday i’m gonna ask my crush if we can have band practice cause that’s fun and i wanna sing(scream) mcr covers againalso i’m totally wearing my revenge hoodie tomorrow/today.. REUNION!!okay, i’m gonna clock out. goodnight beautiful strangers!-ryan

WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE HOW PUMPED UP I AM.of course im sure almost everybody heard about it, but whos to say i cant roll around on the floor muttering random words of happiness xD ?and especially on halloween 2 !!! though i cant gurantee ill b able to celebrate the holiday, i think ill be able to make smthn in honor of mcr comin baccsucks though i wont be able to come to their concert, im in in cali x_xstill, im so happi !!! xD

Today I got to wear my Halloween costume to school! I am, of course, dressed as a vampire as I promised •vv•. I must say I feel rather over dressed however, because I’m one of the only ones with such a complex costume. It makes me a bit self conscious but I’ve been learning to appreciate the attention :>.  Here in Texas it’s actually gotten very cold overnight, so I hope I’ll be able to stay warm while handing out candy to all the trick-or-treaters (Sadly my very cool coat that’s part of my costume isn’t very warm).  Also!! I’ve just found out that MCR may be back!!!! I’m so unbelievably happy about this!! It’s funny though because I was thinking only two days ago about how they should reunite ^w^!!~🕸Cobweb Gossamer🕸~

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