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i never once would’ve imagined myself resorting to a friend making site for social interaction but i’ve officially been unenrolled out of school and i haven’t left my room in months soooo... i caved and made a profile (,,¬﹏¬,,) but i know myself too well meaning i’m probably going to be very inconsistent on here and just stick to the same routine as always (talking to my girlfriend 24/7) so i might just use fp as some sort of internet diary anyone can interact with (𖦹﹏𖦹;) yayyyy... i’ve always wanted to be an internet princess (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) 

Oceans of angelsOceans of starsDown by the sea is where youDrown your scars   𓆩♡𓆪 

CREDIDTST O SCOT AN LILIANAN

Written as a school assignment in which I had to turn the last song I listened to into a song. I lie alone in the coffin and begin to question everything that led up to the moment as it becomes harder to breathe. The bitter cold inside of the coffin chills me to the bones, and as my vision goes blurry, the skeletons of people long dead seem to surround me, welcoming me into the catacombs I wish I could’ve never seen alive. I had made the decision to bury myself all on a whim: my father had laughed at me when I told him I had claustrophobia, and in a fit of rage, I told him that I would bury myself alive if it meant getting over my fear of claustrophobia.    “Or you could just take the elevator this once,” he teased. That was the final straw. The next day, I ran away from home and decided to bury myself in the cemetery deep within the forest by my house. I had gotten some help from Lillian, a friend whose father works at the cemetery, but as soon as I heard Lilly’s footsteps pattering away from the cemetery, I began to wonder if it was really as good of a decision as I had believed it to be just hours prior. It was almost as if my body had left its soul behind and decided to do something I would have never wanted to do. I would’ve never wanted to nail myself in this coffin, but it felt as if I had no choice. And I knew I had no choice the millisecond that the first nail hit my coffin. This is the most extreme thing I have ever done. And now I deeply regret it. Does Lilly regret it too? Would she even visit me when I’m gone? Does her father even know that her very own best friend was careless enough to bury himself alive to get over his fear of small spaces?   I try my hardest to remember, and then it dawns upon me that my grave was not marked. I hope that ghosts exist so I can spit in the face of my father. After all, it is his fault that I am dying in my very own coffin now.   Kicking and punching the coffin I have trapped myself in, I begin to think of all those tales I had heard in my youth of how people who were buried alive would communicate with the outside world. And then I remember that my cellphone is in my pocket, but the space is far smaller than I thought it was as I attempt to reach down into the pocket of my jeans. I try to pull my cellphone by the charms clipped onto it, but it is a struggle I quickly give up on. Last I checked, the old blue thing is probably dead anyways. As soon as I relax my arms and give up on trying to reach for my cell phone, it dawns upon me; I won’t escape. Will the tale of Sam, the Boy Who Buried Himself Alive ever be deservingly spoken of? I try not to think about how badly I messed up and shut my eyes tight, thinking of anything to distract me from my fate. But as it all fades into a bright white, I know there was no escaping it.

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I hate when your family promises you something and then turns around to stab you in the back. If your not going to follow through with what you told me in the first place then why say it. I am so close to just cutting them off because not only are you breaking your promises to me but also to my children and that is where I draw the line. Lying to me is one thing but I am not going to let you do that to them. They are to innocent to deal with your lies and manipulative behavior. 

everyones always like "vriska did everything wrong!!!" "vriska did nothing wrong!!" but when you look at the story for once in your f***ing life (homestuck fans read the book challenge GO), it isnt really a debate; what she did and whether it was wrong or right is really out of the question because its based off of moralitytechnically, what she did was BOTH wrong and right which i believe would give great balance to this funky morality scalebecause take these factors into account;-vriska was not casteist, unlike equius or eridan-alternia is incredibly harsh, and most trolls would do what she did WITHOUT redemption just for the fun of it-vriska did not grow up with a stable lusus; she had to feed bodies to her lusii, pretty much acting as a slave to her mother-every one of the main kids and main trolls are 13 years old/6 sweeps. they are children being exposed to HARSH amounts of severe trauma daily, and having the pressure of the world on themselves so that they dont become a doomed timeline-she definetly did hurt a lot of people, but she did it for overall benefit to support the timeline to prevent EVERYONES deaths, not just a few people (who can be revived)thats why i think there is no answer to the vriscourse debatesit is up to morality; but really, what IS proper morality? you could state that she did nothing wrong, and there would be plenty of rebuttalsyou could state that she did everything wrong, and there would be plenty rebuttalsall there really is to say is that theres balance, vriska is not good or bad. she is a child, alongside everyone else playing the gameanyways

Grrr I have so many missing assignments I need to complete AND ITS THE END OF THE QUARTER UGHHHAnyways school sucks ˂3

Anyone got advice fr? I broke up with my boyfriend last night...

Name?: Tirian Nicknames?: Tiri, IanAge?: 15Single/Taken?: singleAre you happy with that?: DunnoHow many kids do you want to have?: I dunnoWhat would you name them?: Eric, Fern, Andromeda, KeelieDo you have a best friend?: yesAre they a guy/chick?: GirkDo they like you more than a friend?: NoDo you drink?: NoDo you like to party?: YesDo you smoke?: YesWhat do you smoke?: mary jaaaneHave you ever been in LOVE?: yesDo you believe in love?: yesHave you ever had your heart broken?: more than onceWho was your last boyfriend/girlfriend?: ......Are you happy that you are no longer together?: YesDo you hate him/her for that?: YesWhat is your favortie band/singer?: The Offspring, SublimeWhat is your favorite song?: Why don’t you get a job? - The Offspring, Badfish - Sublime, Original Prankster - The OffspringWhat is your favorite movie?: Grown UpsWhat is your favorite flavor of ice cream?: Chocolate!What is your favorite color?: Baby blue + greenWho is your best friend?: Kenzieee! since 4th gradeDo you know everything about them?: YES!How many siblings do you have?: 8+Are you happy with that?:What are you listening to right now?: Original PranksterWhat was your last drink?: WaterWhat is your favorite food?: TilapiaDo you have more guy/girl friends?: Girl friendsWould you date any of your friends?: DunnoIs this survey getting on your nerves?: No.....What was the last thing you watched on T.V?: PsycheDo you know who E.T is?: YesDo you believe in aliens?: YesDo you believe that all cheaters will always be cheater?: YesDo you believe in dying becasue of lost love?: AbsolutelyHave you ever had someone close to you die?: YesWhat was his/her name?: IHow did you know one another?:  Best friendsHave you ever "Jump shake your booty, Jump, Jump shake your booty"?: SCREAMINGWhat kind of cell phone do you have?: I don’t ˂3Who was your last txt from? On here? My ex AxelYour second?: Henry Jekyll Your fifth?: GorepupYour ninth?: SpringleWhat did you last txt say?: "You already have it planned I’m the caterer"Your second?: "Honestly just drown rn......"Your fifth?: "new album new album"Your ninth?: "I don’t like you like that Sam"One or the other...not both...pepsi/coke?: pepsiwhite/cream chocolate?:chcocolllttlove/lost?: lovemoney/love?: lovefriends/money?: friendsfamily/friends?: friendspens/pencils?: PENCIlHawthorne Heights/Atreyu?: HawthorneLindsay Lohan/Hilary Duff?: DUFFAll Time Low/AFI?: ATL!computer/music?: computercamera/computer?: computerRANDOM!!!last person you slept with?: no1!last person you ate with?: my best friends momlast person you hit?: My best friendlast person you cried over?: my cat or my exlast person you hugged?: My best friendlast person you kissed?: Can’t rememberlast person you said "I LOVE YOU" to?: Can’t rememberdid you mean it?: idkprobably not right?: idklast relationship lasted?: Idklast hookup lasted?: I don’t do hookupslast party was where?: school......ONE WORD...to describe...last party was:: alcoholband:: musicneedles:: weirdspaghetti:: redflyleaf:: asssenses fail:: absolutelyll cool j:: idkrap:: ehrock:: yesmetal:: loudlove:: amazingrelationships:: threadschool:: suckswork:: moneycell phones:: textsboyfriend/girlfriend/alone:: nonefriends:: yaaaaaythis survey:: LONG

Im gen tweaking rn, over Alien Stage, anyways have a sigma day/night

 hii gyus idont vent a lot but literally nobody i have in my close circle cares how i feel so i need yo get this oout u dot have to interacmost people i know and talk to daily dont really care about me which suckseven the ppl i hold closesti listen to them vent and as soon as i need something or someone i’m left alonei really needed somebody tonight and nobody cared nobody even askedeven when i try to mention it, like "i did this today, that sucked", hoping they’ll ask me to elaborate or somethingbut they never doand it’s 4 peoplethe same 4 people every day i talk to so excitedly and gradually i lose energy because they get mad at me so easily, they hate me so easily, they hardly respondnobody in my life is constant. im always so scared because everybody abandons me, and is it so wrong for me to hope theyll fight for me??? i just wanna feel important, feel like anybody looks forward to seeing or talking to mei cried all weekend i miss how things were, i miss my dad, i hyrt a lot but i dont voice it because who cares? when i bring it up i’m shut down. i feel like i’m attention seeking, i just want to feel like i’m worth it againam i attention seeking? please answer honestly if anybody reading has anything to say or if u can relate thatd help  

    Mystic Poetry of Sant Tulsi Sahib of Hathras             Behold Your Beloved Within    This is one of the few ghazals^ written by Sant Tulsi Sahib. This ghazal was written to explain the esoteric secrets of the spiritual path to a Muslim divine, Sheikh Taqi, who happened to pitch his tent in the neighborhood of Tulsi Sahib’s residence. The Saint impresses upon Taqi to seek God within his own self and not in the world outside. Much of the mystery of the inner realms becomes resolved at the eye center, from where the aspirant commences his spiritual journey.   Listen, O Taqi, seek not thy Beloved in the world outside;   Within thine own self, behold the splendor of thy Beloved   In the pupil of thine eye is a mole, wherein is hidden the entire mystery;   Peep within and behold thou what lieth beyond this dark curtain.   The secret of the fourteen realms will, for certain, be disclosed to thee;   Let thy attention not slip, see that thou art ever vigilant.   Listen! Thou art constantly being called from the Most High.   There ever beckons thee the voice of thy Beloved.   It is not meeting with the Beloved that is arduous;   What is difficult, O Taqi, is that it is hard to behold Him.   Without the grace of some realized Guide, says Tulsi,   The path of salvation is distant, beyond thy reach.   _____   ^ A ghazal is a form of lyrical poetry, originating from the Persian literary tradition,  which generally deals with the subject of love. Every two lines of a ghazal are usually complete in themselves. _____     Cosmic Flight Through the Sound Current   Whose soul is attached to the Word, revels ever in cosmic flight;   Revels ever in cosmic flight, and realizing the Lord, plays with Him.   The mystery of the inaccessible and the  secret of the scriptures he unravels.   He reaches his Home within and its essence he comes to know;   In the lotus feet of the Beloved he sees his true destination.   The happily married woman rejoices with her Spouse every moment, O Tulsi,   For her soul is attached to the Word, and revels ever in cosmic flight.   (Sant Tulsi Sahib, Book of Shabdavali)     #Mystics #Poetry #India #Spirituality #Meditation #InnerVisions #InnerSpace #ThirdEye #Gnostic #Mysticism #SantMat #Sants #Saints #Sant_Mat #SuratShabdYoga #InnerLightAndSound #ThePathOfTheMasters #Consciousness #PathOfTheMasters #SantTulsiSahib #TulsiSahib #TulasiSahiba #Beloved #LordOfLove #LordOfTheSoul #Radhasoami