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abby

Last Login:
October 19th, 2018




Gender: Female
Status: Single
Age: 18
Country: United States

Signup Date:
July 28, 2017


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10/13/2018 03:12 PM 

This Is What People Do, Right?

Every failure makes us weaker and we wonder if it'd be easier if we didn't fail anymore.

We sit back and brandish the gun but we never stop to think why we bother if we're the only one. 
It's not fair, but neither is life, so we give up our hearts and polish the knife.
Mothers will cry and blame themselves and our friends will point fingers at mirrors. 
But the only fault is ours, the pressure suffocating our chests, and the weight of the world resting on our shoulders.
We write our letters in class because we can't imagine our future.
The only thing on our minds becomes pill bottles and silver bullets.
Hang the wreath on my door and make sure to tell mom that I love her all the same.
Don't print my name or tell my story.
I don't want the fame.
Erase who I was, who I am, and who I could have been. 
Just make me a number amongst numbers, indeterminable from one another. 

lovelovelovelovelove
abby

10/13/2018 01:06 PM 

Another Survey

When was the last time you held someone's hand?

Can't remember

What are you doing right now?
Avoiding writing an essay

What color is your shirt?
blue

Who was the last person you texted?
my best friend

Have you ever kissed anyone who's name started with a J?
no

Would you get married if you could right now?
no, i don't want to get married

Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?
my friend

What is the next concert/show you're going to?
i'm not sure!

Are you in a good mood?
no

The last person you argued with?
not sure

Do you prefer warm or cold weather?
cold

Is any part of your body sore?
yeah, my shoulders and stuff

What do you wear more jeans, sweatpants, or slacks?
jeans

Who makes you so mad you could puke?
Mr. President

Plans for this weekend?
homework :/

If you were another person, would you be friends with yourself?
not sure

Where did you sleep last night?
my bed

Are you confident in yourself?
haha no

Brothers/sisters?
I have a brother

Are you watching anything?
not right now

What's one thing you've never told anyone?
no offense but if i've never told anyone, i wouldn't tell random people on the internet

Favorite colors?
black

Drinking anything?
no

Are you listening to music?
no 

Your favorite fruit?
strawberries

Is there anyone who's a lot like you?
danisnotonfire

Do you like change?
no

Do you get offended easily?
i don't know

What were you doing this morning at 7am?
sleeping

What were you doing 15 minutes ago?
eating cereal

What is on your mind right now?
that essay I have to write

When was the last time you spoke in front of a large crowd?
yesterday i guess, it was only for a class 

10/07/2018 03:56 AM 

The Man Who Had Everything and the Girl Who Had Nothing

After all this time you still make my heart beat erratically. 


And I still can't believe the softness in my eyes when I look at you.

I don't know how, but you melt all of my insides away.

I wish I could keep you inside my heart and save you for a rainy day.


loveloveloveabby

10/04/2018 09:30 AM 

I'm at the Start of a Pretty Big Downer

what are the three most terrifying words you can think of?

a lot of people would say something along the lines of "you have cancer,"
some people would say "we should talk,"
others would say "I love you."
but me?
mine are
"Are you happy?"
because
"I don't know."

loveabby

09/17/2018 02:01 PM 

Bless Me Father for I Have Sinned

i'm drowning in a river of you

i was meant to be baptised but i think i'm being martyred
so make me the poster boy for your scene but you're not getting saints you're getting sinners
yeah i think you're worth the brazen bull
it's the least i can do for my golden calf
sorry, you make idolatry look so good

lovelovelove
abby

09/17/2018 12:54 AM 

It Was Always You

i could kid myself in thinking that i'm fine
this isn't about words
this is about feelings
it's not for painting pictures
it's for plugging in my thoughts to the amplifier and praying the eyes aren't too harsh.
point at the girl with the hole in her heart and the empty space in her hands.
hands.
i wonder what yours hold now.
books... lots of books.
maybe another hand.
"wellwhydoyoucareanyway"
the north wind carries your silent protests from pennsylvania to new york
icanhearyou
because you sweat sugar rather than salt and you don't even know it
i wish i wish i wish with all my wishful heart that i wasn't wishing for a wish one hundred miles apart

09/17/2018 01:09 AM 

719

wish wonder longing

heart hands head
what if you found these
wouldn't it be nice
every time that you walk in the room
rabbits spring green
huck finn and 719
books books books
words words words
good little catholic boy 
a sheep amongst wolves
these are the things that remind me of you

love love love
abby

09/13/2018 11:50 AM 

I Don't Think Anymore I Just Feel

tonight is about pretending that they're someone else

maybe they have the same eyes but a closer look will tell you that they don't hold the same mirth
please melt away my love and affections because even the summer heat couldn't dispose of what was left
(whichwaseverythingtherewasbefore)
i'm your favourite haunt and you don't even know it
i wish you did so you could send your ghost away
postcards from new york
i hope you send me letters sealed with a kiss
but i know you won't write let alone spare me what i've wanted for so long
this is for you and him because i can't make up my mind
you have the same blood anyway

loveabby

09/05/2018 11:53 PM 

The Sky Seems Lonely Tonight. I Know I Sure Am.

when will god close his eyes, turn his head, and pull the trigger?

sometimes even bright minds with dull eyes need to be put out of their misery.
if this world wasn't meant for me, i wish that i could be meant for it.
i wish for a lot of things, but the shooting stars don't seem to agree.
i wonder what i could do to get on their good side.
maybe i could start by not hoping for good fortune as they incinerate and disperse into debris.
imagine if you saw a man jump from a seven-storey building and thought, "I wish to find true love."
seems silly, doesn't it?
even cruel, perhaps.
but i wish i could be like a shooting star.
so when i fall, at least i could make some wishes come true.
and i think that's the noblest pursuit of all.

loveabby

08/28/2018 12:07 AM 

Messages.

You lost your partner in crime.
I guess that's what happens when we gamble in this game called life. 
I lost too.
I lost you.
When it's me versus the world in the boxing ring, it's good to know I've got people in my corner. 
The world has no one because it f***s all of us over.
Sometimes I win.
Most times I lose. 
Right now, it hit me when I was down.
I can hear the referee call...
but maybe it's my Rocky moment.
Ring. Ring. Ring.
Hey, it's me, again. Abby. From class. Last year. Fifth period. I looked at you like you were the light at the end of the tunnel? Yes, I was the one that sat behind Brigid. I just wanted to say that...
Beep.
Ring. Ring. Ring.
Sorry--Abby, again--I got cut off. You gave me a fever. No, you are the fever. You infect everyone you touch, and that's very inconsiderate because as far as I know, there's no cure for you. You know, you're a real...
Beep. 
Ring. Ring. Ring.
Parasite. Disease. Virus. A beautiful infliction. If you had the Black Plague, everyone would want to catch it from you. In fact, I think you're the cause of every pandemic out there...
Beep.
Ring. Ring. 
"Hello?"
You're the face that launched a thousand ships. 
 hugs&kisses, abby 

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