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Bleh!

Dragi dnevnik!I felt pretty proud of myself today! Mainly because of one reason but ill get to that later. I woke up at 8 am about 5 minutes before my zoom classes started. Don't know why I decided to wake up that late. I usually wake up at least 30 minutes early just to get ready and take care of my dog but whatever. I had 2 classes, should have had a third one but I forgot about it. The past days went on so fast! I wake up and as If i had counted from 1 to 3 It's already 4 pm. 4pm is a pretty important time of the day for me as I take my dog out for a long walk and calm myself down.I really like walking my dog, epecially on weekends when I can go into the forest with him, hike and blast music. I used to hate walking, jogging or just anything that had to do with draining my energy but ever since I got Brun about half a year go I've been outside most of my day. Todays walk was pretty interesting. A few minues after I got out of my house I saw a girl, she was really pretty. She kind of had a grunge style/vibe to her. I had never seen her in my town before so I figured taht she was visting some of her firend that live around here. We were walking in the same direction and I saw that the little glances she was giving me, once she stopped i walked past her and we waved and exchanged smiles. I went on with my walk and I saw her again not even a few minutes later. She seemed lost. I usually don't like talking to new people, today however was different. I decided to change my way and looked at where she was going. This sounds a little creepy but I promies it wasn't lol. She was constantly stopping, looking around and at her phone. So I went for it. I actually walked up to her and asked her If she was lost. Before I actually asked her I revised in my head what I was going to say and what came out was completely different. "Um, um ,um, hi, sorry lol,  I noticed that you were wandering around a little um and I just wanted to um ask you if you were searching for anything :)"This was really embarrasing but at least I got the courage and walked up to her. I get really nervous when I have to talk to someone that I don't know, hell I've even fainted once at school when I had to do a presentation in front of like 30 poeple. She ended up explaining me that this was where her boyfriend lived and it was her first time here so she had no idea what she was doing. We talked for a few minutes. God, she was SO nice! I couldn't believe I actualy did that haha. I've been thinking about this all day and I just can't stop. Then I just went on with my day as usual :) I was outside for around 3 hours, most of them at my secret spot that I like to go to when I want to relax. I also draw there, listen to music and sometimes bring my friends there.I made myself fake nose piercings today so that was also quite interesting. I liked they way they looked specially on my lips and as a septum. I forgot how weak my nose is though and because I was constantly touching the ring when it was in my nose I made myself bleed. That wasn't very pogchamp of my nose :( Can't remember what I did after tho as I fell asleep and woke up at around 11 pm. Since I woke up I've just been watching streamers and talking to my friends on discord. It's about to be 3am now and I don't like staying up late so I'm going to finish this here.Till next time!

!!! w/ xX_galatZiggurat_Xx !!! h3y 3v3ry0n3!h3r3 1 4m w1th my g00d fr13nd!! th3y r zo p0g 0mg :333w3 h4d 4 gr8 t1m3 2g3th3r l4zt n1ght!!w3 w3nt 1nt0 th1z r34lly 0ld bu1ld1ng 4nd t00k s0m3 c00l p1cz :pph0p3 2 z33 th3m 4g41n z00n ♥33thxx0x0xXx_idiotskittle_xXx  

how do planes work like how do they not fall out of the sky

what did i get myself into

υpdaтe: Covιd ιѕ gerтιng вad ιn canada вυт noт aѕ вad aѕ мoѕт coυnтrιeѕ. ι aм вacĸ aт ѕcнool вυт твн ι aм ĸιnda ѕcared aѕ ι нave a really вad ιммυne ѕyѕтeм. Word oғ advιce тo тнe neхт generaтιonѕ тнaт wιll read aвoυт тнιѕ~ Don't forget about living, because when that time is taken away from you, you're only wishes will be to live. 

hey everyone. I am new to this. I like it so far

mah dad just found mah smol L4Z3R P01NT3R! im so happy!!   :D /)^°^(\

i just like write random stuff here!! im just head empty /)^°^(\ no think!! ;P 

CW : ED MENTIONS, DYSPHORIA// 1 D1DNT 3X4CTLY 1NT3ND FOR MY F1RST BLOG ON H3R3 TO B3 R34LLY H34VY OR 4NYTH1NG, BUT L1K3 GOD D4MN H4S TOD4Y B33N 4N 3XP3R13NC3. SUR3 1T W4S PR3TTY NORM4L 4T TH3 ST4RT, OR 4T L34ST, 4S NORM4L 4S TH1NGS G3T 4ROUND H3R3; NOT L34V1NG MY ROOM UNT1L 1'V3 4SSUR3D 1T'S S4F3 TO DO SO, TH3 TYP1C4L TH1NGS. 1 R34LLY W4SN'T 3XP3CT1NG FOR MY P4R3NTS TO B3 SO M4D TOD4Y, BUT TH4T 3N3RGY H4S R34LLY JUST B33N M4K1NG 1T SH1TTY.// 1'V3 B33N M34N1NG TO TRY 4ND P1CK UP B3TT3R 34T1NG H4B1TS, BUT TH3 F34R OF G3TT1NG FOOD 4ND JUST G3N3R4L N4GG1NG 1N TH3 B4CK OF MY M1ND TH4T 1 SHOULDN'T, OR OTH3RW1S3 JUST DONT D3S3RV3 TO DO SO 1S S3R1OUSLY G3TT1NG TO M3. 3SP3C14LLY W1TH JUST TH3 F4CT 1 K33P LOOK1NG 4T TH3 NUMB3RS 4ND JUST TH1NK1NG 4BOUT WHY 1T'S L1K3 TH1S, TH4T 1T'S 4LL SOM3HOW MY F4ULT D3SP1T3 MY F4M1LY B31NG TH3 R34SON 1 US3D TO JUST 34T OUT OF BOR3DOM. 1 4LSO JUST CONT1NU3 TO COMP4R3 MYS3LF TO OTH3R P3OPL3 1 KNOW 4ND JUST W1SH1NG 1 COULD B3 L1K3 TH3M 1NST34D OF B31NG... HOW 1 4M.// 1 4LSO JUST K33P W1SH1NG 1 COULD P4SS B3TT3R. L1K3 1 D3SP3R4T3LY W4NT TO PR3S3NT HOW 1 W4NT, BUT 1 C4NT. NO M4TT3R HOW H4RD 1 TRY 1 PROB4BLY N3V3R W1LL LOOK HOW 1 W4NT TO. 4T TH3 L34ST 1 JUST W4NT TO B3 FL4T, G3T R1D OF TH3 W31GHT ON MY CH3ST, PHYS1C4LLY 4ND M3T4PHOR1C4LLY. H4H4.// ON 4 MUCH SOFT3R NOT3, 1'V3 B33N M4K1NG SOM3 K4ND1 4S 4 M34NS TO P4SS TH3 T1M3, SO 4T L34ST TH4TS B33N FUN >:] 

If you'd have told 17 year old me back in 2007 that Myspace would be dead, facebook considered for "old people" and pretty much everything I knew completely flip even MORE I would have probably in not so nicer terms told you to get bent and I didn't believe you. I can more then like 99,9% garentee you could of given me the written copy of my life and I would of flipped through looking for stuff that sounded the best and just focused on that and been like "eh yeah thats nice" and carried on just assuming that great stuff would show up not even understanding all the inbetween sh*tty stuff you need to expierence before even HALF of the good stuuf even comes and even then sometimes your so focused on how hard the crappy thing effected you you don't even realize the good moment in front of you. 

Everyone is against everyone else. I just want to have a good time with people that just care about other people and send and give peace and want to just let people be happy and not angry. legit yall NO ONE CARES WHO IS CANCELLED FOR THE NINTH TIME ON TWITTER. IM TIRED I HATE SOCIAL MEDIA>> GOODBYE. But also hello friends project because im off that mess for a while thats to xAstrologicalx. ♥

feel like dying or whatevr :p

I am struggling so much in school right now. They assign us so much work that I cant even keep up with. I am currently failing algebra and am close to failing all my other classes. I have so many past due assingments. And my parents are so mad at me because my grades are slipping, and im uncomfotable with telling them that I barely have the motivation to get out of bed nevermind do all of this schoolwork. Anytime I try to talk about my mental health with my dad he invalidates me and basically tells me depression isnt real. Im slowly loosing interest in everything I loved, I quit the field hockey team because I was scared that I wouldnt be good, and that Id embarass myself. I turned off notifications for every app. Talking to people stresses me out, I always feel like im going to say the wrong thing so I just stopped responding to everyone. But then I feel bad for not responding because people are like double and tripple texting me and then I think to myself, I cant respond 3 days after they send the text, so ultimately I decide not to respond at all. Im slowly loosing all my friends and it sucks. I have one really close friend, but sometimes I feel like im annoying her and that she hates me. I know its just my anxiety getting to me, but I notice every single change in tone and when I feel like im annoying her I leave her alone, but then I get really sad because I feel like I have no one. She has alot of problems of her own so I try not to bombard her with my problems because I know she has her own to deal with. I just always feel so alone and like I have no one to talk to. Im in the process of getting a therapist, but its taking awhile due to covid. I have an idea of what I would be diagnosed with, because its really easy to self diagnose. But I feel like if I tell her what I think I may have, shell tell me I dont have it and then I will just feel stupid, which again is just my anxiety talking but idk.TW: self harm mention Im always thinking about death and I always have intrusive thoughts and my cutting is getting worse and worse and idk what to do about it. anyways if anyone is actually reading this lol, i love you, youre beautiful/handsome/attractive asf and you are worth it ♥

Hiii! Just testing out the blogging feature. This website is one of the coolest things I've stumbled across. I'm going through a big y2k phase atm so this is giving me life and watering my crops. I am literally in love with friend project. Anyway, that's all I have hehe.